• DAD: mom’s puking. send help. and cookies. hungry.
  • (10 minutes later)
  • DAD: no longer puking. still want cookies. still hungry.
One star!Two stars!!Three stars!!!Four stars!!!!Five stars!!!!! 19 votes

July 8, 2014

Tags:

  • Mom: Dad is on the phone with comcast customer support. It’s not going to go well with “Dave” in Mumbai
One star!Two stars!!Three stars!!!Four stars!!!!Five stars!!!!! 26 votes

June 15, 2014

  • Me: k I’m almost done with my zombie makeup for my project presentation today
  • Mom: zombie?
  • Me: Yeah the one on exponential growth. dressing up was part of the project
  • Mon: oh. I forgot to tell you that you have an orthodontist appointment this morning.
  • Me:
  • Me: and you didn’t think to mention this earlier…?
One star!Two stars!!Three stars!!!Four stars!!!!Five stars!!!!! 18 votes

June 15, 2014

  • (3: 23 am)
  • ME: You just called me…?
  • MOM: SORRY phone just fell into the trashcan
One star!Two stars!!Three stars!!!Four stars!!!!Five stars!!!!! 17 votes

June 15, 2014

  • MOM: Just thought I would tell u good night.   Your dad worked in yard today got his panties in flower bed looks nice.   He will work on yours tomorrow.   Love yo
One star!Two stars!!Three stars!!!Four stars!!!!Five stars!!!!! 27 votes

April 1, 2014

Tags:

  • DAD: How long should I bake the cookies for? The instructions say 9-11 minutes.
  • ME: I do 5 on each rack, so 10 total.
  • DAD: What do you mean by each rack? The bottom then the top?
  • ME: Yes if you put two trays in at once
  • DAD: What if I only put one in at a time? Do I still follow that approach, and, if so, does it matter if I do the top or bottom first?
  • ME: Then just do 10 mins on the middle rack.
  • DAD: OK. Thanks. Might have more questions. Waiting for butter to soften up.
  •  
One star!Two stars!!Three stars!!!Four stars!!!!Five stars!!!!! 28 votes

April 1, 2014

Tags:

  • ME: Why do you keep face timing me and then hanging up lol
  • DAD: Sorry… I’m playing around. Didn’t know it was going through. I’m sick with a cold and bored as hell. I guess it shows.
  • DAD: I’ve even been face timing myself.
One star!Two stars!!Three stars!!!Four stars!!!!Five stars!!!!! 26 votes

April 1, 2014

Tags:

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