DAD: I see that you are in Ravenclaw house. And you didn’t tell me? I can’t believe my own daughter wouldn’t tell me that she’s a witch and not a muggle. That makes me so mad. Have you gotten your wand yet? I bet you have. This just goes to show what trust will do.
ME: ….What are you even talking about?
DAD: I’ve been stalking you on facebook for the past 45 minutes.